This Sunday is a day that celebrates moms across many countries in the world. Yet, according to an article in Scary Mommy, the mothers that should be celebrated are those of young kids, and older mothers and mothers-in-law should be left by the wayside.
In fact the writer's own words after describing a Mother's Day in which she had to consider the older mothers in the family were:
The way I see it, moms who have young kids living at home do enough. We are the ones in the trenches and we deserve a day that’s for us. The truth is, our mothers and mothers-in-law aren’t running kids to practice, making dinner for a family every night, or doing any of the hard labor we are. There was a time when they did, but now, we’re up. We are the ones who deserve to do whatever we want on that day and, if that means canceling plans with our mothers and MILs, then so be it."
I must admit my immediate reaction was that this mom came across as being entitled, demanding, and selfish. This may seem harsh but as a mom-of-four myself, I feel there's nothing better than being able to celebrate all the mothers in my family.
After all, without them my own kids wouldn't be here, and they wouldn't have the vast number of cousins to play with. And, beyond that, I want to acknowledge my mom for all she has done for me in my childhood and adulthood. And if that means a joint celebration, then lucky me!
Many people commented on the article stating that adult kids can be more mentally exhausting for mothers as the issues they're dealing with tend to be more significant. A simple band-aid will not fix the problem, and more often than not the parent has no say or control in what their adult child is doing.
Others pointed out just how much they'd love to be able to spend the day with their mother who'd already passed away: a poignant reminder to cherish our own mothers while we still can.
The true meaning of Mother's Day
However, I suppose what really struck me from the writer's position was her level of annoyance in having to consider anyone else on this day. It's as if she didn't quite understand the meaning of Mother's Day.
While it might be lovely for a mom to be able to put her feet up for a bit, it's actually a day for children to reach out to their mothers and express their love and gratitude. Whether this is through a meaningful card, a trip to a restaurant, or phone call to share their love is up to the child.
The actual origins of Mother's Day stem from an American woman, Anna Jarvis, wanting to honor her dead mother for all the sacrifices she'd made. Jarvis' "version of the day involved wearing a white carnation as a badge and visiting one’s mother or attending church services," according to History.com.
And perhaps that's what the writer needs to consider: Mother's Day is about acknowledging all the mothers out there, no matter their age or position in life. And most importantly, it has to come from the heart.
